He Knows My Name

It's been quite a while since my last post.  What have I been up to?  Well, it's not that I've been up to anything....but God sure has.  I've been being dealt with from my Heavenly Father on some areas where I just was not letting go of the past and still holding on to bitterness that was eating away at me.   Part of it from wrongs done towards me....part of it from jealousy...part of it from the fact that I just felt like things should have gone better than what it did?  Why?  Because I wasn't the center of it happening and the focus wasn't on me.  My sin was separating me from my Abba but dang it, it was MY sin and my sin, is after all, better than yours.
 

I know....  I don't usually talk like this.  I'm probably being a little too transparent for some but you'll be okay.  It had just become so hard and so tiring of being the one who takes care of everyone else that I had decided that I was going to have some "focus on me" time.  Internal focus.....  now where is THAT in the scriptures?  At first, it felt good focusing on me for a change but the feeling was fleeting.  So, I decided to follow Jesus....all over again.  What?  You mean you didn't know that I hadn't?  Well, the old Adam would pat himself on the back at that point and say "Good, they never knew."  Unfortunately, someone did know.  Jeshua.....YHWH....Jesus.   He knew.  He always has....He always will.

 

Ughhh.....SMH......

 

When will I ever learn that #1- I can't hide stuff from Him; #2- it doesn't matter if I'm in the center or not; #3- is the fun of sin really worth separation from the Giver of Life?

 

We all know the answer to that.   God began a new work in my life a couple of months ago.  I sense His presence like never before...I know He was there all along but it's when I finally shut up and listened for Him that I finally heard His presence over mine.  Yes, I meant to type that sentence the way you read it.  His presence dwelling amongst us....to the point that I sense any Sunday His Holy Spirit may fall upon me in the gift of tongues.  I truly felt the onset of the gift a few weeks ago but sensed the Spirit say in my heart, "not yet....in my time, not yours."  (Yes, I'm a Baptist unlike any you've ever met before)

The Worship Ministry at church has taken on a new life....because we have all agreed together that the working of the Holy Spirit was no longer going to be stifled in any way, shape or form.  It's all about Him and what He wants, not what we come to church expecting to get out of it.  Secondly, it's because we have realized that we are first and foremost, there to worship..... before we ever try to lead others in worship, we are ourselves there to worship the King!   I'm so blessed to have such a group as they.   Words can never express how truly amazing each of them are in their own respects....and the way that God can take a group of individuals that are so different from one another and make it work together, seamlessly, is even more amazing!!!

 

What are your thoughts?  I'd sure love to know if any of you have struggled with something like this.....

You Can Teach An Old Dog New Tricks

    

     I've been noticing more and more lately the renewing of the age-old issue concerning worship....

     We've Never Done It That Way Before!  I don't like they you dress for worship!  You sang those songs terribly...the first was too low and the second was too high!

     Those are all things that I have been told in the last 6 months.  Having been involved in the worship ministry now for 21 Years, the response that I wish I could give is usually "UGH".  However, the response that I usually give is "Well, you know, not everyone is able to focus in the way that you can" or something along those lines.  

     Unfortunately, there are many great hymns in the hymnals but they need reviving.  Why?  Because people have sung them the exact same way for so many years that there is no longer any emotion & feeling to them.  Yes, I'm talking about God, the church and worship and I just used the words "Emotion" and "Feeling."

     And before you try, don't start going off on me about emotionalism and that whole "God is not a feeling" routine.  I know all of that but at the same time, I do serve an emotional God and I know my Lord has feelings.  

     Tonight, my Pastor was speaking about how people like to try and wear him down.  They do that to me, too.  But you know what?  I get up the next morning and keep doing what God has called me to do...in spite of them!  I'm sure that the following video would have some thinking "BLASPHEMY".  Let them think it...personally, I LOVE the way they have taken this old hymn and revived it.  Yes, REVIVED it!

     My prayer is that more of the old hymns of the church would experience a revival!

Ministry Doesn't Happen In An Office

As I look back over the last couple of years, I am in awe of the way God has allowed my life to work out. In July of 2012, I thought our world was over when I found myself out of work.  How would I be able to support my wife?  God had blessed us up til that point with Kelly being able to be a stay-at-home mom.  Now, she was having to look for work.  How would I be able to feed my three children?

I went home that afternoon trying to prepare myself on how to prepare my family to lose our home and lose our vehicles.  I had allowed myself to fall into the pit of self-pity.  I thought my ministry was over.  I had told people for years that ministry doesn't happen in an office...yet, here I was without an office thinking that my ministry days were over.

God had the last laugh.  Looking back, I can count the dots in reverse...and when I do, the line passes through the dots of a middle school e.s.e. worker, part time worship pastor along side a childhood friend and finally at a home healthcare agency.

WHAT?!  Okay, I've been a teacher before so the middle school wasn't too hard to grasp but home healthcare?  Seriously, Jesus...what are you up to?  Well, like I said, God had the last laugh because I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT!  And I am finding out more and more every day that there is a whole ministry field that I had never considered...yet I find it is me that receives the blessing at the end of the day.

Today, I had the ENORMOUS privilege of driving to our office in Gainesville to take part in an educational in-service on this AMAZING product called "The Bionic Leg."  I was one of three team members who was able to actually put the leg on and see for myself just how it works.  It is an "intent based" assistive device that therapists can use to help their patients with lower extremity ambulation issues.

I can't speak for my co-workers but for me, being able to learn about and then to wear the leg today was a life-changing experience for me.  I found myself almost in tears on my way home.  How many of my relatives could have had a better last few years had this product been available back then?

That's when Jesus chimed in....

"HELLO? ADAM?!!!  HERE IS YOUR MINISTRY!  I've been preparing you since July of 2012 with each "dot" to help you with this new task.  Your family members were not able to benefit from this but others can!"

My goal.....no....my MINISTRY is to give someone else's family the chance my family didn't have....THE CHANCE TO LIVE!!!!

(me standing up with The Bionic Leg for the first time)

Remember Me

So many times, we enter the sanctuary remembering what God has done for us yet an hour to and hour-and-a-half later, we are on our way home or to a restaurant and for many of us, we have already forgotten him until next Sunday.  If God remembers us every second of every day as He has promised, why don't we do that?  I believe that if He were to pick up a microphone in our worship times and join along in singing, this would be the song He would sing.