Friday, October 31, 2014

He Knows My Name

It's been quite a while since my last post.  What have I been up to?  Well, it's not that I've been up to anything....but God sure has.  I've been being dealt with from my Heavenly Father on some areas where I just was not letting go of the past and still holding on to bitterness that was eating away at me.   Part of it from wrongs done towards me....part of it from jealousy...part of it from the fact that I just felt like things should have gone better than what it did?  Why?  Because I wasn't the center of it happening and the focus wasn't on me.  My sin was separating me from my Abba but dang it, it was MY sin and my sin, is after all, better than yours.
 
I know....  I don't usually talk like this.  I'm probably being a little too transparent for some but you'll be okay.  It had just become so hard and so tiring of being the one who takes care of everyone else that I had decided that I was going to have some "focus on me" time.  Internal focus.....  now where is THAT in the scriptures?  At first, it felt good focusing on me for a change but the feeling was fleeting.  So, I decided to follow Jesus....all over again.  What?  You mean you didn't know that I hadn't?  Well, the old Adam would pat himself on the back at that point and say "Good, they never knew."  Unfortunately, someone did know.  Jeshua.....YHWH....Jesus.   He knew.  He always has....He always will.
 
Ughhh.....SMH......
 
When will I ever learn that #1- I can't hide stuff from Him; #2- it doesn't matter if I'm in the center or not; #3- is the fun of sin really worth separation from the Giver of Life?
 
We all know the answer to that.   God began a new work in my life a couple of months ago.  I sense His presence like never before...I know He was there all along but it's when I finally shut up and listened for Him that I finally heard His presence over mine.  Yes, I meant to type that sentence the way you read it.  His presence dwelling amongst us....to the point that I sense any Sunday His Holy Spirit may fall upon me in the gift of tongues.  I truly felt the onset of the gift a few weeks ago but sensed the Spirit say in my heart, "not yet....in my time, not yours."  (Yes, I'm a Baptist unlike any you've ever met before)

The Worship Ministry at church has taken on a new life....because we have all agreed together that the working of the Holy Spirit was no longer going to be stifled in any way, shape or form.  It's all about Him and what He wants, not what we come to church expecting to get out of it.  Secondly, it's because we have realized that we are first and foremost, there to worship..... before we ever try to lead others in worship, we are ourselves there to worship the King!   I'm so blessed to have such a group as they.   Words can never express how truly amazing each of them are in their own respects....and the way that God can take a group of individuals that are so different from one another and make it work together, seamlessly, is even more amazing!!!
 
What are your thoughts?  I'd sure love to know if any of you have struggled with something like this.....

Sunday, June 1, 2014

You Can Teach An Old Dog New Tricks

    

     I've been noticing more and more lately the renewing of the age-old issue concerning worship....

     We've Never Done It That Way Before!  I don't like they you dress for worship!  You sang those songs terribly...the first was too low and the second was too high!

     Those are all things that I have been told in the last 6 months.  Having been involved in the worship ministry now for 21 Years, the response that I wish I could give is usually "UGH".  However, the response that I usually give is "Well, you know, not everyone is able to focus in the way that you can" or something along those lines.  

     Unfortunately, there are many great hymns in the hymnals but they need reviving.  Why?  Because people have sung them the exact same way for so many years that there is no longer any emotion & feeling to them.  Yes, I'm talking about God, the church and worship and I just used the words "Emotion" and "Feeling."

     And before you try, don't start going off on me about emotionalism and that whole "God is not a feeling" routine.  I know all of that but at the same time, I do serve an emotional God and I know my Lord has feelings.  

     Tonight, my Pastor was speaking about how people like to try and wear him down.  They do that to me, too.  But you know what?  I get up the next morning and keep doing what God has called me to do...in spite of them!  I'm sure that the following video would have some thinking "BLASPHEMY".  Let them think it...personally, I LOVE the way they have taken this old hymn and revived it.  Yes, REVIVED it!

     My prayer is that more of the old hymns of the church would experience a revival!